TOUCH of Laura Branigan, Part 1

The third of July is the birthday of a woman whose work I dearly love. Laura Branigan died nearly 4 years ago, and I still grieve. I never got to see her live in concert. I never got to approach her in person and talk with her. To this day, it devastates me.

However, thanks to technology, we still have that wonderful legacy she left us: her voice. In 1979, Branigan signed with Atlantic Records and three years later, her song “Gloria” was a bona fide hit in the U.S. and overseas. Long after her other singles and releases will be forgotten, the gleeful and infectious energy of “Gloria”, a song that Branigan herself said was dark, will be remembered.

For me, I prefer her other singles. After all, “Self Control”, released in 1984, was a bigger hit, and the songs “Solitaire” and “How Am I Supposed To Live Without You?” (for better or worse) started the songwriting careers of Diane Warren and Michael Bolton respectively. It is “Solitaire”, a song originally written in French, but a young Diane Warren penned the English version (it was the songwriter’s first Top 10 hit), which begins with almost a whisper goes to a crescendo of operatic epic proportions, that better demonstrated Branigan’s four octave range (true, there are singers with a five octave range, but many of them have used their range for effect with little consideration for the actual meaning of the songs, or the nearby dogs that were tortured: in contrast, Branigan let the lyrics open the emotions, which served as a floodgate for her talent).

When people think of Laura Branigan, they think of the early 1980’s: from “Gloria” in December 1982 to “Self Control” in June 1984, and possible reference to 1985’s “Spanish Eddie” and her 1987 cover of Jennifer Rush’s “The Power of Love”. This last single was on Branigan’s fifth studio album with Atlantic, Touch. According to a poll taken among Branigan fans at Laura Branigan Online (which can be found at http://www.laurabraniganonline.com/main/poll/poll_0011_r.php),

Touch is considered the singer’s best album (I confirmed the results the evening July 2, 2008, but of course, there might be some Self Control fans who may change the results later). I am firmly in the pro-Touch camp. In fact, I am presently listening to the album as I blog. Play it on your iTunes and join me, won’t you?

Of course, before you do, let me advise you of the order of how I play the songs of Touch. When the album was initially released on vinyl and cassette, this was the order of the songs:

1) Over Love
2) Shadow Of Love
3) Angels Calling
4) Meaning Of The Word
5) Power Of Love
6) Shattered Glass
7) Whatever I Do
8) Spirit Of Love
9) Name Game
10) Touch
11) Cry Wolf

However, the compact disc edition of the album ended with the song “Statue In The Rain,” which was the B-side song to the album’s first single “Shattered Glass”, as a bonus track: when Touch was reissued earlier this year by Wounded Bird, “Statue In The Rain” was kept as the final track.

There is some contention among Branigan fans regarding “Statue In The Rain” and Branigan’s cover of “Name Game”: they argue over which track should have been left off the album. They argue that “Statue In The Rain” should have been on the album in its initial release and that “Name Game” (which I admit is an earworm) should never have been on the album and that it ruins the emotional balance of the total album.

My solution: I went into iTunes and adjusted the track sequence thus:

1) Over Love
2) Shadow Of Love
3) Angels Calling
4) Meaning Of The Word
5) Power Of Love
6) Statue In The Rain
7) Shattered Glass
8) Whatever I Do
9) Spirit Of Love
10) Name Game
11) Touch
12) Cry Wolf

Why this sequence? “Statue In The Rain”, like much of Branigan’s repertoire, is an anthem of longing and loneliness, the sadness of a broken heart, but its music is oddly upbeat. As such, I find it bridges well the passionate conviction Branigan displays in “The Power Of Love” (Atlantic oddly drops “The” from this song’s title in the liner notes for Touch) and the energetic storm that is “Shattered Glass.” Most importantly, it lets the album close with “Cry Wolf”, which will make more sense as you join me listening to Laura Branigan’s album Touch.

What? You don’t have a copy of Touch?

Hey, this is 2008: the album is available at the iTunes Store (at least the U.S. iTunes store): download it now!

(And for you “old school folks”, the reissued compact disc is available at LB's Boutique, which can be found at http://www.laurabraniganonline.com/store/index.php).

Get it now, or take a different leap of faith and trust my take on Branigan’s songs. Either way…read the next blog post and enjoy Touch.

After so long...from Take That to Heather Locklear

Ok. so five months is a pretty long time to throw a fit because Take That's "Rule The World" was not nominated for an Academy Award. Oh yeah...well, the Academy still sucks: Montgomery Clift, Agnes Moorehead, Rosalind Russell, and Richard Burton all died before they got Oscars and yet (XXX) has won one. (I could name oh...SEVERAL overrated actresses that have won an Academy Award...but that would be bad form...and it doesn't change anything).

So, rather than talk about politics (yes, here in the States...regardless of which stuffed suit wins in November, grab the silicone and the polyurethane 'cuz we're screwed), recent automotive frustrations, lost camcorders, Madonna's "marital problems", and romantic disappointments, I want to actually say something else.

Apparently the great Heather Locklear has been having some difficulties in her life. The woman who made Sammy Jo and Amanda the bitches we loved to hate (actually, I don't think that I ever hated Amanda) on Aaron Spelling shows Dynasty and Melrose Place has been fighting anxiety. I am glad that she took the steps to get herself better and sought help: too many people choose to make others suffer or take other immature and cowardly approaches to mental illness. In contrast, Locklear, it has been reported, has recently checked herself into a facility in Arizona, away from Hollywood. See that? She sought help: this is a woman who clearly loves life and has provided us an example to remember.

Obviously I don't know her, but she always has had this positive aura and charisma which the camera loves, a gift and talent that I admire. Whether she plays a working class vixen arguing with Alexis Morrell Carrington Colby Dexter Rowan, or she's plays the boss of the good girl's wayward boyfriend who then buys the apartment complex and sleeps with everyone but the gay tenant, Locklear does it with style and flair.

Browsing the web, I was unable to find a decent site to send her a note to wish her well. Well, I am a Fan, and this where I can post such sentiments.

If she--or someone that she knows--is prone to Google-bate, maybe she will find this...

Miss Locklear...take care of yourself: Your health and well-being are your priorities and are in our prayers.

Hmmm...1st of July. Only a few days until...

Take That...denied!!!

I've been so upset, it's taken some time for me to talk about this...

Hollywood fucking sucks!!

The Academy Award Nominations were announced a while back. Take That's song for the film STARDUST, "Rule the World", did not get nominated by the Academy for Best Song.

I love that song.

Hollywood sucks.

My Four Immodest Proposals, as decided on the 4th of January, 2008

In this blog, the President of the United States is not the Decider...I am!

With that in mind, I HAVE DECIDED:

1. ) Since domestic partnerships can be a practical way for couples who cohabit to legally protect their property in common--it's about property, stupid! (As for granting social recognition for same-sex couples, no...but I HAVE DECIDED that social recognition is boring right now). Therefore, in the interest of private property, there will be Domestic Partnerships;

2.) Since Anderson Cooper seems to be someone who has it together (I mean, the haircut, the wardrobe, and for crying out loud, he's Gloria Vanderbilt's son!), I HAVE DECIDED that he will take legal guardianship of Britney Spears's two children, since those bambini sadly have parents who patently do NOT have it together;

3.) I HAVE DECIDED that Anderson Cooper and Larry Birkhead will have a Domestic Partnership...because they could make a lovely couple and together they could promote a fabulous style (wow...i think Oscar Wilde just possessed me to type that!) for the post-club scene crowd; and

4.) I HAVE DECIDED that Anderson Cooper and Larry Birkhead will raise the children of Britney Spears and Anna Nicole Smith as siblings. They will live in some private setting owned by the Vanderbilt family, leading quiet dignified lives away from the press, and they will not have to explain their home and lives, because despite being a news reader for CNN, Cooper knows the importance of discretion, and Birkhead will know that if he tries to court too much press, he will risk losing a good thing.

Think of that...the white trash litters of a skank and a starlet will be free from the tacky and tawdry legacies of their mothers by post-twinks who can dress well.

At least, that's what I HAVE DECIDED.

My Daemon...what do you think?

Reflections on the Holidays

Let me begin with the foundation that while I have contempt for the coercive enforcement of what is called "Politically Correct", I do believe that respect and goodwill are values without which society does not function very well. Sure, history is full of functioning societies that were rank with fear and injustice; that Castro is still living, Chavez rules in Caracas, the junta in Burma, and various other villians continue to control billions of people on the planet (heck, Putin was Time magazine's "Man of the Year" for 2007) indicates that this approach is not yet part of the graveyard of failures, where one prays National Socialism will forever rot.

(Wow, got off the tangent there).

So, this is December 2007, a few days before Christmas. Christmas is nominally the Feast of the Nativity of Jesus, but was originally the Feast of the Unconquered Sun.

SIDEBAR:
If you read recent newspapers in the United Kingdom, you'd think that this was some revelation from the present Archbishop of Canterbury. NEWSFLASH: Any book on Christmas written for children of at least 10 years of age, published say no less than the past two decades ago (that is, when I first started reading such things), could have told you that. DUH! The New Testament makes no mention as to the time of year when Jesus was born. "Oh, and it wasn't in a stable either!" Really? This is news to you? Did you ever look at a Nativity icon in an Orthodox or Eastern Rite Catholic Church? I'll bet not, because if you had, you would have noticed that their depictions of the Birth of Jesus show the Glorious Event to have occurred in a cave in a mountain. WHOA! Here I am, some scion of Mid-Western right-wingers, and I seem to know more about this stuff than "cultured and educated" journalists. Man, you people suck!
END BAR

So anyway, Christmas is the Feast that was scheduled to observe the Birth of Jesus. However, it is also a legal holiday in the pluralistic and secular United States of America. This curious mandate dates back to in the 1800's, when it was made into the law by votes from both Houses of Congress (that is, the House of Representatives and the Senate) and signed by the President (in this case, Ulysses S. Grant). It may have been councils of bishops that determined that the feast of the Birth of Jesus would coincide with the feast of a pagan sun god, but it was the secular authority of the government of the United States that made it a legal holiday in this country whose federal incarnation, unlike England, Scotland, Norway, Denmark and other countries (most of them, very democratic and modern nation-states), can never have an Established or National church.

This holiday often curiously coincides with Hanukkah, the Jewish Feast of Lights. Other than the symbolic importance of light (stars, candles, lamps, etc.), Christmas and Hanukkah have little in common, and the latter is not even considered a major feast in Judaism, certainly nowhere near the importance of Christmas to most churches (yes, I know some churches regard the pagan origins of Christmas with suspicion...but I don't care what they have to say right now...or ever, for that matter). Hanukkah is not Christmas, but has understandably been popularized by Jewish people who do not like to feel left out. If anything, Hanukkah, which celebrates the liberation of the Jews from the yoke of their Greek overlords from Syria, has more in common with the American Independence Day than Christmas (compare the revolt of the Maccabees to that of the American colonists against the British).

However, since Christmas is nominally about the birth of Jesus, who might be considered a minor prophet by modern Jews (if at all), observant Jews have little cause to celebrate this holiday (hence the popularity of Hanukkah by some modern Jews). Given the two thousand years of hostility between Jews and Christians, this is understandable: the Crusades, expulsion from Spain and most other European realms, the Blood Libel--these are not good memories shared. Some Jewish people have taken to celebrating Christmas as a pagan holiday (notice that the very Jewish Barbra Streisand made a Christmas album: this probably has little to with money so much as art--Christmas has a lot of good music!), which, given the evolution of Christmas from the Unconquered Sun, to the Son of God, to the drunkenness that led to the feast's ban by the joyless Puritans, to a legal federal holiday in the United States, to the present incarnation (pun intended) of "the Season of Giving", this makes sense. (There is that delightful American Jewish Christmas meal tradition...of Chinese takeout! I love that!)

Of course, you get the Cromwell Bastards who hate Christmas and want to eradicate its symbols from the public arena. "But it's a Christian holiday!" they scream as they cry for lawyers to remove Nativity scenes, Christmas trees, and Santa Claus. May Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo smear them with feces forever! (see SIDEBAR some paragraphs below.) They are killjoys and are beneath contempt

At the same time, you get others who wail how Christmas is now so commercialized. Well, idiots, yes, it is commercialized. Now, consider that the holiday shopping season represents almost 30%-40% of the annual business of many retail outlets. This isn't about corporations like Target, Wal-Mart, Barnes & Noble, Best Buy, but about their employees, who earn wages (however meager) and sometimes get bonuses (alas, less and less so, but still, some do): this money goes towards their livelihoods and allows them to tangibly show love to their families. Yeah, you go ahead and smirk with your quasi-leftist sense of superiority and self-righteousness that would make an Dominican from the Spanish Inquisition blush, but if you value the story of Jesus, or at least as this time of the calendar has been so invested by the church, then you remember that life in the physical world matters: otherwise, there would have been no Nativity, whether in a stable or in a cave.

What is so fascinating is how Christmas has been absorbed by societies where Christianity is not the dominant religion. I read an article in a major newspaper in India, discussing how people in this modern democracy (one that is officially secular but with a Hindu majority) have embraced Christmas. "Oh really? Celebrating Jesus as an avatar of Vishnu?" Perhaps, but more likely, they see the good in celebrating Christmas, the lights, the music, the cheer and mirth shared when presents are exchanged among family and friends. This is the magic of Christmas, the birth of Divine Love on earth: even if you reject a belief in the divinity of Jesus, or even in God Himself, surely you can witness the goodwill that is shared, even among those rejected by Jesus's more xenophobic followers who condemn Hindus as "heathens". It proves that to celebrate Christmas need not entail conversion to Christianity, merely an investment in humanity. The joy of Christmas is a natural phenomenon, but so powerful that even the Puritans' ban on it was overturned like Aslan's breaking the White Witch's spell over Narnia.

SIDEBAR:
In 1997, Trey Parker and Matt Stone, the creators of "South Park", invented a Christmas character that goes beyond Santa and Rudolph: Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo. These two geniuses from Colorado proved that the goodness that we invest in Christmas is so absurd but so powerful that we can even rally around an animated piece of festive feces. No other holiday in the American culture has such powers.

Also, ever hear the phrase, "As gay as Christmas"? That's because of the over-the-top decorations, the color, the drama, the music, of all that is Christmas. It doesn't take much to turn Christmas into camp, and that is gay.
END BAR

Although I do not have many Jewish friends, I like Hanukkah. The heroic glow of the Menorah should be honored and respected, not only as a triumph of light over dark, of heritage surviving, of culture thriving despite external cruelties and wanton destruction. Everyone of goodwill, especially Christians, should be grateful for the survival of the Jewish nation, a people whose contributions to the humanities, the sciences (especially medicine), and the law, far exceed their numbers (Jews make up less than 1% of the world's population): it is also from the Jewish nation that Jesus was born. If there was no Hanukkah, or at least the cause for its celebration (the revolt of the Maccabees), then there would be no Jesus with a Nativity to celebrate, much less celebrate in lieu of the Unconquered Sun. Contrarily, if no one celebrated Christmas, it is doubtful that many would notice observation of Hanukkah.

As for the commercialization of Christmas: again, in and of itself, it is not a bad thing. However, shopping malls in America should refrain from Christmas decorations until the last Friday of November (a.k.a., Black Friday, the day after Thanksgiving). There should be a similar withholding of Christmas music from the airwaves. Sure, I welcome the opportunity to hear the sweet voice of Karen Carpenter, oh so rich in sadness, anytime of the year, and Christmas is just about the only time we can hear her sing again ("Merry Christmas Darling"): having said that, I beg you, please refrain from Christmas music until the middle of December, say, Saint Lucia's Day (if you are Scandinavian or Italian, you'll know what I mean).

SIDEBAR:
While Christmas music is superior in the manipulation of the heartstrings (Judy Garland singing "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" is devastatingly heartbreaking and beautiful; Whitney Houston's rendition of "Do You Hear What I Hear?" is both joyful and triumphant), some Christmas music just plain sucks. If I ever hear "Jingle Bells", "Jingle Bell Rock", or "Winter Wonderland" (not to be confused with its most excellent parody by Bob Rivers, "Walking 'Round In Women's Underwear", which is always welcome to my ears), it will be too soon. And who the hell told Stevie Nicks to sing "Silent Night"?: the Welsh Witch should stand back, and if anyone falls down a landslide into a silver spring, it's her own damn fault! Furthermore, hearing Jewel sing Christmas songs in December reminds me why I never bought any of her albums during any month of the year.
END BAR

So...as long-winded as I can be, I wish you all a Merry Christmas (and to those in the United Kingdom and the Commonwealth, Happy Christmas)!! To those who celebrated the Feast of Lights in the United States, Israel, and all over the world, a belated Happy Hanukkah!!

Salutations to our troops, our allies, and in honor of the example of Jesus, to those who wish us harm, may the angels sing Peace on Earth in your hearts and souls.

To the Cromwell Bastards out there: hey, even Harry Potter celebrates Christmas!!

And God bless us...everyone!

Shootings at Westroads Mall in Omaha

I live in Lincoln, Nebraska, about an hour's drive to the Westroads Mall in Omaha, where on December 5, 2007, someone killed several innocent people before he did the decent thing and ended his own life. A shame he didn't think to just end his own life first and spare the others.

I have read very little about the killer beyond the headlines that said he wanted to go out in style. Who the hell did he think he was, Dr. Strangelove? He was an asshole and he's dead. His death isn't worth tears: tears should be shed for the victims he made; it's really sad that he was so limited that he couldn't figure a way to just kill himself and not take others with him.

I suspect that others will use this to push for stricter gun laws rather than improve the enforcement of gun laws that are actually on the books. Oh well. It saddens me, because it means that I will have to depend on the authority of the government to protect me, and I learned as a teenager how worthless authority is at protecting the weak from bullies (But, for the record, presently I am not actually a gun owner). Probably time for me to learn Krav Maga, that Israeli martial arts which is all about ruthlessly neutralizing your opponent. (And from what I read about the Six Day War, boy, the Israelis truly made that into an art form.)

When Westroads reopens next week, I want to go there and buy items from at least 3 different stores and one item from the food court. Having worked in retail for over a decade, I know that this time of year can be 30%-40% of a store's annual income. Forget all the holier-than-thou crap that comes out of the smirking mouths of wealthy trust fund limousine liberals and from the pursed frowns of the religious right, whining how this season is just "too commercial": a Christmas season where people buy presents for the people they love also contributes to the livelihoods of the millions who work in stores, factories and in the trucking and shipping industries. Let's forget this asshole and let's flip off the Left ("This is how I redistribute wealth, Billary!") and the Right ("Hey, I'm the Decider for myself, Dubya!") and buy things for the people we love.

(This blog is an adaptation of comments posted at the All Things Bitter blog.)